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View Full Version : Extremely racist/offensive/mean jokes MASS COLLECTION


Afroholic
01-18-2005, 08:12 AM
Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole?
A: A pedophile.

Q: What's a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game?
A: Before the First Period.


Q: How do you swat 200 flies at one time
A: Hit an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

Q: What is a redneck virgin?
A: A seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.


Q: What do you throw a Mexican man when he's drowning?
A: His wife and kids.

Q: Why is a Black mans eyes always red after sex?
A: From the mace


Q: Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself?
A: You would too if you were named Auuurraaagggghhh!

Q: What is the most positive thing in harlem?
A: HIV


Q: How do you drown a black preson?
A: Pop their lips.

Q: Why do Jewish girls like to fuck doggy style?
A: They can't stand to see somebody else have a good time.


Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: One stops sucking when you slap it.

Q: Who are the two most famous black women?
A: Aunt Jemima and Mother Fucker.

Q: What's long, black and smelly?
A: An unemployment line.


Q: What do you call a Puerto Rical midget?
A: A spec.

Q: What's the difference between a British man and his girlfriend?
A: His girlfriend has a higher sperm count.


Q: Why is there so little Puerto Rican literature?
A: Because spray paint wasn't invented until 1949.

Q: What did Dodi Al-Fayed say to his driver the morning before the crash?
A: Do you want to go out with me and Di tonight?


Q. How do you know if a Chinese person robbs your house?
A. Your homework is done, your computer is upgraded, but two hours later, the fucker is still trying to back out of your driveway.

Q: What's the difference between a black man and a pizza?
A: A pizza can feed a family of four.


Q: Why is it so hard for Mexican women to get pregnant?
A: Because as soon as the sperm enters the cell it tries to hang itself.

Q: How do you starve a black man?
A: hide his foodstamps under his workboots.


Q: What's the first thing a redneck says after losing her virginity?
A: Get off of me Dad, you're crushing my cigarettes.

Q: What do rednecks and KFC have in common?
A: They do chicken right.


Q: In Kentucky, what do divorces and tornados have in common.
A: Either way, someone is going to lose a trailer.

Q: Why do the Scottish wear kilts?
A: Because a sheep can hear a zipper from like a mile away.


Q: What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire?
A: Drowns

Q: Two (insert favorite ethnic group here) jump off the top of a very tall building. Which one his the ground first?
A: Who gives a fuck?


Q: What's so good about an Ethiopian blow-job?
A: You know she'll swallow.

Q: Why did the redneck cross the road?
A: Because he coundn't get his dick out of the chicken.


Q: What does a redneck say after sex?
A: Thanks Mom.

Q: What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection?
A: Quarter pounder with cheese.

Q: How do you kill 100 Mexicans?
A: Blow up their van.

Q: What do you call five Mexicans on the bottom of a pool?
A: Sinko


Q: What's black and blue and hates sex?
A: A rape victim.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?
A: They both drip when they're fucked.


Q: What did the little black boy say when he got diarrhea?
A: I'm melting!

Q: Why do black people smell?
A: So blind people can hate them too.


Q: What do you call a fat chinese person?
A: A chunk.

Q: What did the little Mexican boy get for christmas?
A: My bike.


Q: How are fat bitches and Mo-peds the same?
A: They are both fun to ride, but you don't tell your friends about them.

Q: How many house wives does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None! what the Fuck they doing out of the kitchen!?


Q: How do you blindfold a chinese person?
A: Dental floss.

Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza?
A: A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven!


Q: How many jews can you fit in a VW Beetle?
A: 54, two in the front, two in the back, and fifty in the ashtray.

Q: Why do black people play basketball?
A: They can run, shoot, and steal


Q:What did Adolf Hitler get his neice for her birthday?
A: An easy bake oven.

Q:What would the Jetsons be called if they were black?
A: Niggers.

Q: What's the difference between St. Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?
A: On St. Patrick's Day, everyone wants to be Irish.

Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a hunger strike?
A: Ethiopian


Q: Why don't Puerto Ricans have check books?
A: Because it's impossible to sign your name that small with spray paint.

Q: How do you know when a redneck has her period?
A: She's only wearing one sock.

Q: What do you call an ethiopian with buck teeth?
A: A rake.

Q: What do you call an ethiopian wearing a turban?
A: Aq-tip.


Q: What's this? (pinches skin on both sides of neck)
A: An ethiopian eating a cornflake.

Q: Why do they put shit around the church at a packy wedding?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.


Q:How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a white girl?
A:Throw them a basket ball.

Q: What do you call a hooker with a runny nose?
A: Full


Q: What does FUBU really stand for?
A: Farmers Use'ta Beat Us.

Q:Whats the difference between a pakie & a bucket of shit?
A:The bucket.


Q:What do you call a pakie with a wooden leg?
A:Shit on a stick.

Q:What do you call a pakie with two wooden legs?
A:A waste of wood.


Q: What do you call an ethiopian jumping off a cliff?
A: A chocolate drop.

Q: How do you get 100 jews into a car?
A: Throw a quarter in it.
Q: How do you get them out again?
A: Tell them Hilter is driving.


Q: What do you call two ethiopians in a sleeping bag?
A: Twix.

Afroholic
01-18-2005, 08:13 AM
Q: How do you get 100 ethiopians into a phone box?
A: Throw a tin of beans in.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Run past with a tin opener.


Q: Why do arabian women put a red dot on their foreheads?
A: Helps for better aiming.

Q: What do you do after you rape a 12 year old deaf dumband blind girl?
A: Brake her fingers so she cant tell her mom.


Q: Why doesn't Mexico enter the Olympics?
A: Because all their best runners, jumpers and swimmers are in America.

Q: How did the Grand Canyon get there?
A: Two Jews dropped a quarter down a gopher hole.


Q: How do you kill a redneck?
A: Wait 'till he fucks his sister then cut the brakes on his house.

Q: How do you kill 100 Ethiopians?
A: Throw a Biscuit off a clif.

Q: What do you do when you see someone having a seizure in a bathtub?
A: Throw in a load of dirty laundry.

Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with. The other is used to carry groceries.


Q: How do you really piss off your girlfriend while having sex?
A: Call her on the phone.

Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison?
A:"I feel like a kid again."

Q: What do you get when cross an Italian with a gorilla?
A: A retarded gorilla.

Q: What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A: Freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

Q: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
A: Nothing you already done told her twice.

Q: Why could Jesus walk on water?
A: Shit Floats.

Q: What do you get wne you cross a black man and a mexican.
A: A person who's too lazy to steal.

Q: (hold hands out like a crucifiction) What's this?
A: A really bad way to spend easter

Q: What was good about the million man march?
A: Only three people missed work.

Q: What do you do when your womans watch breaks?
A: Nothing there's a clock on the stove.

Q: Why aren't there any puerto ricans on Star Trek?
A: They won't work in the future either.

Q: How do you fit 4 queers on a barstool?
A: Flip it upside-down.

Q: What do you call a blacks in a sleeping bag?
A: Snickers.
Q: What do you call two blacks in a sleeping bag?
A: Twix.
Q: What do you call a black and a white girl in a sleeping bag?
A: Rape.

Q: What's the useless skin around a vagina called?
A: The woman.

Q: Why are KFC and a woman the same?
A: When you're done eating them all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

Q: How do you keep an indian out of your back yard?
A: Move the trash cans to the front.

Q: Why did God give women three more brain cells than cows?
A: So they don't shit on the floor while doing the dishes.

Q: Why is tylenol white and not black?
A: It works.

Q: Why do Jews have big noses?
A: Because air is free.

Q: Why do Black people have sex doggy style?
A: So they can both watch Soul Train!

Q: What's a homless woman use for a vibrator?
A: Two flies in a bottel.

Q: Why was helen keller such a bad driver?
A: She was a woman

Q: How's a packie keep the flies off her food?
A: Opens her legs.

Q: What is a nickname for a chinese person?
A: Sleepwalker.

Q: How can you tell when an Etiopian is pregnant
A: Her tampon is half eaten

Q: Do you wanna hear a joke?
A: Women's Rights.

Q: Whats the new definition for mass confusion?
A: Fathers day in harlem.

Q: Whats the difference between a black man and a bike?
A: Your bike doesnt start singing when you put chains on it

Q: Whats the difference between real Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
A: It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

Q: Why shouldn't women have driver's licenses?
A: There's no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

Q: What do you call a Mexican with a sunburn?
A: A REFRIED BEAN

Q: What do you call a white Orgy?
A: A snowball
Q: What do you call a Black Orgy?
A: Mud Wrestling
Q: What do you call a Mexican Orgy?
A: FAMILY REUNION!

Q: Did you hear about the Taliban members that they found in Harlem?
A: They caught Bin Stealin', Bin Rapin' and Bin' Bangin'. However, Bin Workin' is still at large.

Q: What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe?
A: A canoe tips

Q: What do 3 million abused women do wrong every year?
A: They dont fucking listen

Q: What do you call a black priest?
A: Holy shit

Q: What's the worst thing about eating vegetables?
A: Putting them back in the wheelchair when you're done.

Q: How do you circumcise a redneck?
A: Kick his sister in the chin.

Q: Whats black and drips down the window?
A: Coondensation

Q: What do you call a bunch of white guys running down a hill?
A: An avalance.
Q: What do you call a bunch of black guys running down a hill?
A: A mudslide
Q: What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill?
A: A jailbreak

Q: Why are black peoples palms white?
A:Because theres a little bit of good in everyone!

Im not racist i have a color tv.

Q: Why does helen keller masturbate with one hand?
A: So she can moan with the other

Q: What do Ethiopeians use for deoderant?
A: Chapstick

Q: Why are black peoples palms white?
A: Cuz they were up against the wall when god was spray painting them.

Q: Did you hear about the chinese couple that had a retarted baby?
A: Yea, they named it, Sum Ting Wong!!

Q: What do black people get when they pick thier nose?
A: Noogers!!

Q: Have you heard about the new car designed by the Jews?
A: It stops on a dime and then picks it up

Q: What do u call 4 mexicans in quicksand?
A: Cuatro sinco.

Q: How many irish does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 2, one to hold it in place and the other to drink intill the room spins.

Q: Did you hear about the two car pile up in Mexico?
A: 200 Mexicans died.

Q: What does the human race and jelly beans have in common?
A: Nobody likes the Black ones.

Q: How do you know if an italian has been in your back yard?
A: Your garbage is knocked over and your dog is preagnent.

Q: What's the difference between a black man and a pizza?
A: A pizza can feed a family of 4

Q: How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None,they just sit in the dark and bitch

Q: What is the difference between a Russian and a bag of shit?
A: Nothing

Q: Why is the black power sign a clenched fist?
A: So they dont fall off the trees.

Q: Whats the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
A: You can unscrew a light bulb.

Q: What's the best thing about fucking homeless girls?
A: When you're done, you can drop 'em off anywhere.

Q: What did Hitler Give his Daughter for Christmas?
A: An easy bake oven.

Q: Why did hitler kill himself?
A: He got his gas bill.

Q: What do fags call their balls?
A: "Mud flaps"

Q: What happens when you stick your hand in a bowl full of black jelly beans?
A: You get your watch stolen.

Q: Whats long and hard on a black man?
A: The first grade.

Q: What's the difference between a black man and Batman going to a deli?
A: Batman can go to a Deli without Robin!

Q: Why did Raggedy Ann get kicked out of the toy box?
A: She sat on Pinocchio' s face and said "lie to me!"

Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury dough boy?
A: Ared headed bitch with a yeast infection.

Q: What happened when the jew walked into the wall with a hard-on?
A: He broke his nose.

Q: How do you get a nun pregnant?
A: Dress her up like an altarboy.

Q: What do you call 40 mexicans buried up to their neck in sand?
A: A spicket fence.

Q: What do you call a school bus full of black people?
A: A rotten banana.

Q: Why can't stevie wonder read?
A: Because he's black.

Q: How long does it take for a black woman to take a shit?
A: Nine months.

Q: What do you call a bunch of Mexicans in a swimming pool?
A: Bean dip.

Q: Whats the difference between a Catholic Priest and acne?
A: Acne doesn't come on a boys face untill after hes thirteen.

Q: What do you do when your dishwasher doesn't work?
A: Slap her.

spunkypunky
01-18-2005, 08:56 AM
\Q: Why is a Black mans eyes always red after sex?
A: From the mace.

i don't know why but that is my favorite...but watch the double posting...

Afroholic
01-18-2005, 08:58 AM
i don't know why but that is my favorite...but watch the double posting...

i had to.. max number of characters

alejmac
01-18-2005, 03:16 PM
Q: What do you call a black priest?
A: Holy shit

Nothing against blacks, but the joke was really well put together, awesome thead, reps for you!

stupidpuppet
01-19-2005, 06:48 AM
Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with. The other is used to carry groceries.

so naughty, but i like it. :lol:

James Bond 007
01-19-2005, 07:42 AM
Good post, nice selection of offensive jokes. I liked the one about putting shit around a church to keep the flies off the pakki bride (notice the correct spelling of "Pakki" lol).
I also laughed at the 2 famous black women one Aunt Jemmima and Mother Fucker but who is Aunt Jemmima?

nothinbutnet
01-20-2005, 08:55 PM
Good post, nice selection of offensive jokes. I liked the one about putting shit around a church to keep the flies off the pakki bride (notice the correct spelling of "Pakki" lol).
I also laughed at the 2 famous black women one Aunt Jemmima and Mother Fucker but who is Aunt Jemmima?

isn't she the surup lady?

Captain Marvel
01-20-2005, 11:27 PM
whats the difference between a catholic priest and acne?


acne comes on your face after you turn 13

somedaysoon
01-27-2005, 11:18 PM
Why did the feminist cross the road?
To suck my cock.

3Diablo7
01-27-2005, 11:26 PM
Wow you wrote all that man that was alot

lunchBOX55555
01-28-2005, 01:00 AM
WOOT!!! finally some new racist jokes

OLIAX
03-23-2006, 02:58 PM
Q: Why do the Scottish wear kilts?
A: Because a sheep can hear a zipper from like a mile away.

you bastard haha :bigwink:

ohshit just realised this was a dead thread

teamdescent
03-23-2006, 03:41 PM
Those were hilarious, good post.

Ninja
03-27-2006, 02:17 PM
Q: What do you get when cross an Italian with a gorilla?
A: A retarded gorilla.

this was my favorite, i dont have anything against italians, the joke is interchangable with any race and it cuts right to the point. Thats why its awsome

MiKe
03-27-2006, 02:50 PM
Q: What do you call an ethiopian with buck teeth?
A: A rake.

The mental image I got when I read this one made me pee a little.

Mr. Fuck You
03-27-2006, 02:56 PM
Reps on a list well done!
http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e341/GrapeNuts1/Reps-4-U.jpg

Naruto
03-27-2006, 04:02 PM
I don't know if this was posted before as I didn't read it all but here you guys go.

Q) Besides all the terrible things going on, what's positive about Africa?


A) HIV.

SmokeMonkey
03-28-2006, 01:28 AM
what do you call a fag in a sleeping bag?

fruit roll up.

belladoyle
04-12-2006, 05:02 PM
Q: What do you call a black priest?
A: Holy shit

Nothing against blacks, but the joke was really well put together, awesome thead, reps for you!
I AGREE THAT WAS V FUNNY

rand0m
04-12-2006, 05:36 PM
OMG, seen about 75% of them, but reading through them made me laugh so hard my sides hurt.

crazyjames1233
04-29-2006, 08:20 PM
im suprised no one has started bitching about being offended yet.

what did the kkk guy say to the black guy in the tree?

"hows it hangin"

Beemis
04-29-2006, 09:16 PM
If a couple in Alabama gets divorced, are they still brother and sister?

..

I'm glad you brought this back, I hadn't seen it before. Great compilation!

Errant Spittle
04-30-2006, 12:14 AM
Q: What do you do after you rape a 12 year old deaf dumband blind girl?
A: Brake her fingers so she cant tell her mom.


that was probably the most offensive one there...great job

Mad Rad
04-30-2006, 01:08 AM
Q: What do you do after you rape a 12 year old deaf dumband blind girl?
A: Brake her fingers so she cant tell her mom.


that was probably the most offensive one there...great job

That was my favorite.

cadbury people
09-23-2007, 01:53 AM
:mad:
your so sick in the head!!!! i love baggin jews and all that but ppl with disabilities arent different from u and me... u should be ashamed of your self cuz ur low as dirt u sicko

bigballs
09-23-2007, 03:15 PM
Thanks for bringing a gr8 thread up I loled

Abstroose
09-24-2007, 08:28 AM
LOL, an old thread but they made me laugh.

Death
09-24-2007, 02:11 PM
:mad:
your so sick in the head!!!! i love baggin jews and all that but ppl with disabilities arent different from u and me... u should be ashamed of your self cuz ur low as dirt u sicko

How are they not different from you and me? Please, explain.

Durt
09-29-2007, 06:16 PM
Best Thread Ever!

Jakobee
09-29-2007, 07:17 PM
I went to my first Muslim birthday party the other day. Musical chair's was a bit slow but fuck me pass the parcel was fast!

What do Paula Radcliffe and Hitler have in common?
They both tried to finish a race.

Funny compilation.

hye
09-30-2007, 03:54 AM
What do you call a retarded chinese guy?

Something Wong.



A nigger, mexican, and redneck in a car whos driving?

The cop.

joric
10-04-2007, 04:28 AM
They were hailarious no doubt. What if a Maxican reads them?

Shalun
10-04-2007, 06:42 AM
Russian best joke colection , i hope u like it :lmao:


http://lostworlds.lv/go.php?1139621034

MikeHawk
10-08-2007, 03:51 AM
They were hailarious no doubt. What if a Maxican reads them?

This is too easy

joric
10-10-2007, 06:05 AM
The site is in russian?

Nemo
10-10-2007, 08:24 AM
:mad:
your so sick in the head!!!! i love baggin jews and all that but ppl with disabilities arent different from u and me... u should be ashamed of your self cuz ur low as dirt u sicko

"ppl with disabilities arent different from u and me" But jews are?

I know this was said last month... but im gonna say it nonetheless, Shut the fuck up. They're jokes, people are people. Be it retarded, of race, gender, religion. . You're saying it's right to call/make fun of jewish people, but the second someone makes a joke about someone with a disability it's wrong and immoral?

Well that's just about the most fucked up logic i have ever seen on this forum.