James Bond 007
01-19-2005, 08:14 AM
Jesus Christ walks onto the pier at Blackpool and starts telling people who he is, ofcourse nobody believes him so a man from the crowd thats gathered shouts "If your Jesus prove it, perform a miracle or somethin!" so Jesus asks "What would you like me to do?" so another person in the crowd shouts "Walk on water then!" so Jesus turns round, climbs over the railing and then steps off into the Irish sea.
10 minutes later the lifegaurds are dragging him back onto the beach. Everyone laughs at him and someone shouts "I thought you could walk on water knob-head?" and Jesus says "Well I didnt have holes in my feet back then."
When a mother finds her 16 year old daughter is pregnant she scream "Which bastard did this?!"
The girl makes a phone call. Soon a Ferrari pulls up outside her house and an Armani-suited man steps out of it and enters the house. He says "I cannot marry your daughter but I'll provide for her for the rest of her life
If a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 shops, a villa and a £2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be 2 factories and a £4,000,000 bank account. But if theres a miscarriage what do you suggest I do?" Her father puts his hand firmly on the guys shoulder and says "Fuck her again."
10 minutes later the lifegaurds are dragging him back onto the beach. Everyone laughs at him and someone shouts "I thought you could walk on water knob-head?" and Jesus says "Well I didnt have holes in my feet back then."
When a mother finds her 16 year old daughter is pregnant she scream "Which bastard did this?!"
The girl makes a phone call. Soon a Ferrari pulls up outside her house and an Armani-suited man steps out of it and enters the house. He says "I cannot marry your daughter but I'll provide for her for the rest of her life
If a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 shops, a villa and a £2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be 2 factories and a £4,000,000 bank account. But if theres a miscarriage what do you suggest I do?" Her father puts his hand firmly on the guys shoulder and says "Fuck her again."