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Crdwiz32
02-27-2005, 01:44 AM
Hey, I just thought I'd make a thread to post funny quotes in. Here r some starters -

"Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love ."
-Woody Allen

"Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife."
-Groucho Marx

And my personal all time favorite quote:

"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
Terry Pratchett.
spoofer4ever
02-27-2005, 07:57 AM
"You wanna know the best prank ever? While someones sleeping you put there hand in a bucket of warm water and then you pee on 'em!"-Cartman from southpark :icon_rofl :icon_rofl

This one always crackes me up! :bang:
danbascombe
02-27-2005, 01:43 PM
That was really good! South Park is one of my favorite shows!
Espeon
02-27-2005, 05:17 PM
Clara: If that is the truth, then I am truely happy for the two of you, you're a good man Captain Hero, I knew I could trust you.
Spanky Ham: Well, nice work Captain Hero. Here's the $50 I bet you to have sex with Bleh. Oh, I mean um, here is the fifty dollars... uh Captain Hero won off me, because, uh, I bet him he would not have sex with your special cousin Bleh. But he did, in fact have sex with her, oh yes he did. For fifty dollars. Whew, man, saved it.

- Drawn Together :bang:
troutflosser
02-28-2005, 07:19 PM
"Lets put a stick up her ass and use her as a puppet! Like: RAR RAR im scary gram-gram"

-cartman on what do do with the corpse of kyles grandma



"If i had 60 cents for every dollar i had...id be canada!"

-my friend sara
napolandynamite
02-28-2005, 07:21 PM
Family guy quote

Stewie: You cook so slow you don't need an egg timer you need an egg calender!... Thats right, I went there
ribwich
02-28-2005, 07:24 PM
"It will test your head, and your mind, and your brain."-Jack Black, School of Rock

Edit: Another Jack Black quote from the same movie:
"I've been touched by all your kids. And I'm sure that I've touched them too."
evil joe
02-28-2005, 09:39 PM
what does cartman say about giving Butters a hitler in the episode "Asspen"? That is my favorite part of that episode.
spoofer4ever
03-01-2005, 05:42 AM
what does cartman say about giving Butters a hitler in the episode "Asspen"? That is my favorite part of that episode.

I think it was,

(To set the mood, cartman put some crap under butters nose, making him look like hitler, hehe)

Butters: Jeez guys this place sure smells funny
Cartman:hehe, see thats why they call it ASS-pen! get it? ASS pen?