1000 Things not to say right after sex

[SuperDuperMCPP]

Heres how it works..

I start with something and someone else continues it.

1. MOM?!

[Slaphead]

2. Never say,
Hey thanks, I called you a cab, and there's a little something extra for you on the counter.

[veeDuB]

3."Pop-a-Ding-Ding, £2.99 Please!"

[themissinglink]

4. Woo thank god that herpes outbreak cleared up last night, I didnt want to give it to you.

[SuperDuperMCPP]

5. I hope you don't mind itching.

[mcd]

6. You're on the pill right?

[ConanTL]

7. Now you DID know I used to be a male, right? :lol:

[SuperDuperMCPP]

8. You're still here?

[mcd]

9. I guess you weren't the worst ever.

[SuperDuperMCPP]

10. I have aids.

[Manhoe]

11. you taste like bullshit

[pudgmo]

11. Sorry, first cum first served.

[mcd]

12. 9 down, 5 to go.

[Slaphead]

13. So, can I get your sisters number?

[guitarguy]

14. Those pills protect you from getting disease's right?

[DeathCloud]

15. Your mom was better

[SuperDuperMCPP]

16. Is that a family secret? Your sister showed me that yesterday.

[KanoBlade]

17. Who the fuck are you?
18. Damn, i need more alcohol, i think i'm starting to recognize you.
19. Your sister will be over soon, do you want me to tell her to bring a d**** for you or do you want to join in?

[SuperDuperMCPP]

20. Mom?@!

[hosey]

Now I know why he dumped you...

[ebirnhol]

22. [in a John Madden voice] Now let me say a few things about that last play. The receiving corps went over-under in a tight-end route, and then I slipped into the pocket and dumped the ball off for a short gain. Then with the clock ticking down, I hit the seam and went in for a sneak, and then fired a Hail Mary into the end zone. It was a gamble, but it paid off in the end.

[Solid Snake]

22. [in a John Madden voice] Now let me say a few things about that last play. The receiving corps went over-under in a tight-end route, and then I slipped into the pocket and dumped the ball off for a short gain. Then with the clock ticking down, I hit the seam and went in for a sneak, and then fired a Hail Mary into the end zone. It was a gamble, but it paid off in the end.

LMAO :icon_rofl

23. (Pretending to be surprized) Oh no! My condom tore!

[SuperDuperMCPP]

24. I'm Only Fourteen!!!!!!!!

[Green_Day]

25. hey you have a piece of your g string flopping around, oh, wait a minute... OH MY GOD.

[harmlessbunny]

don't worry, i cant get pregnant, i used to be male.

[harmlessbunny]

you're almost as good as your sister





-edit-
srry for the double post.. i mis clicked

[lord_mugatu]

26. Now were did I leave my ring?

[Acidbath86]

27. Does this look infected to you?

[grasica]

What was your name again?

[Devastation]

28. Hmmm, I need to pee.

[tophizzle]

30) Wait, you're alive?!?

[SuperDuperMCPP]

29. next

30. Thanks for the 2 minnutes *sarcasm*

[harmlessbunny]

31. zzzzZZZzzz

[SuperDuperMCPP]

32. Check Please

[Capt_Canada]

33: So you like herpes?

34: Thats not icing sugar the condom broke half way through

[dojob]

[person who you had sex with]: so how was I?

you: i would say a coyote possibly a doubble

[kackmastah]

35. thats all i wanted, can i leave?, you fat whore. btw, your pussy smells like death, jesus christ get a douche...

[getoutofmyface]

36. Hey that thing you gave me broke.

[Remiss]

37: Tomorrow you may feel a burning sensation when you piss, it's really nothing to get worked up about.

[SuperDuperMCPP]

38. *dies*

[getoutofmyface]

38. *dies*
39.Stop bumping your thread with worthless shit.

[Solid Snake]

Ok...

#39. Remember I said I was gonna fuck your sister last? I lied.

[SuperDuperMCPP]

40. I hope you dont mind that i video taped this.

[grasica]

40. ...and then I cast level 8 eroticism,

41. well I liked it the last time I tried it on myself!

42. (funnier if a guy says this) Next time, I'm on top, you nearly crushed me!

43. I've bought stuff better than this from Spencer's!

44. Oh, move over, let me finish this...ohhh yeah!

[SuperDuperMCPP]

45. I guess it is true when they say "Once you go black you never go back" babe i aint never going back!

[ribwich]

46. I guess I'm still technically a virgin.

[Sir Budicus]

47.
guy: wow that was great your pussy was alot wetter this time
girl: yeah i know i picked the scabs just for you baby!
*vomit*

[refoops]

48. You can start now

[Sirius B]

49. You feel that burny itching too?

[SuperDuperMCPP]

50. You're sleeping on the wet patch tonight

[Sirius B]

51. Ummm.... Where did I meet you again?

[chickenlips]

52. Can I clean my knob on your curtains?

[SuperDuperMCPP]

53. Thats it?

[ebirnhol]

54. Wow, that was great baby. Let me say that again in Klingon! Kalron droch tekh!

[Slaphead]

55
Not bad, but your mother and younger sister were more kinky than you, you need to ask them for some advice.

[Blue Mercury]

56. Aah, that was sweet. Now do my friends.

[whocares]

57.- That was great. Now, Fuck off, bitch.

[ebirnhol]

58. Wow, I just beat my high score in Super Mario Bros by 10,000 points!

[j_s2k4]

59. HA. you now have aids. Owned

[Viet Era Marine]

I've had better. :eek:

Regards,
VEM

[paint52baller]

wow your a girl!

[TheExtortionist]

Don't tell your mommy and daddy about this o.k.?

[ebirnhol]

63. Hi, I'm the Percolator. You might remember me from such great sexual episodes as 2 minutes ago.

[cambo]

you where good but our sister was better

[TallyWhacker]

Do you have any fungal cream?

[evil joe]

66. Now that that's over I need some advice. Do you ever get real itchy near ur crotch and you can see little bugs crawling around in ur pubes? That's been happening to me since that night in Vegas.

67. Now where is that candy you promised me mister?

68. That was fun. Cya at the family reunion uncle bob.

69. <-- Hey look! 69! HAHAHA! thats a funny number

70. My friend taught me that trick about using gasoline for lube. *lights cigarette*

71. I can't feel my legs...

[esruC]

72. Dammit! I'm in trouble now! *Runs to Mexico*

[sNiPe_]

73. The rumors are true, your mom IS better in bed.

[JamSessions]

74. You know its funny, I have little bugs making a nest in my crotch. *Looks down at other person* Oh I guess you do too, now.

[Strider]

75. Wow thats one flat chest...


ps. I took your icon... HA!

[InNirvana]

76. Your even better than your mother!

[grasica]

77. Aw man, I got one of your hairs in my mouth, eeeewww, next time chop your forest down!

78. I'll give you a great deal, one time offer, compliments of my offices. book an appointment for liposuction, and your next botox is 75% and comes with a free gift from Lancome!

[megangel]

79. What just happened? Where am I?

[teamdescent]

80. Haha look at that little crab on the bed...... oh crap.

[Chubi Chan]

81:I didn't know your sister had AIDS?(Double owned!)

[Eab]

82. Well you just confirmed my belief... Once you go Black Lab you can never go back.

[ebirnhol]

83. Wow, that was amazing. You know, that reminded me of this time when I was 7 years old, and I was on the playground, and then Sally Jenkins sat down next to me, and then she started picking her nose, and that made me laugh, and then I started picking my nose, then I snorted my chocolate milk through my nose and I was choking on chocolate milk. That was the day I swore never to pick my nose again. Also, may I kiss you on the face?

[benoit]

84. rip off!

[refoops]

85. Well....add least your foot was big.

[ebirnhol]

86. Okay, it's my turn. I summon Valkyra, Lord of the Dark-Winged Centaurs. And with my Bonus Hit Points card and +15 magic armor rating, I damage your fleet 2,000 men!

[SuperDuperMCPP]

Please enjoy your two days to live..I have necrofatiuts.

[Kartika]

88. Okay.............................................. .............wanna play some Halo 2?

[biscuit]

10. I have aids.

best. quote. ever.

[iLLmatiK]

89. now im going to murder you.

[BlueOrder]

90.NOW............................................ .....You die.

[eadgbe]

91:
god, i'm glad that was over quick. i really have to take a shit.

[SmoothKnight]

92. Minister McCayie?!

[Volcom_Dewd]

93. I have herpes

and for your partner to say

94. Oh thank God! I was afraid to tell you that I had them as well! :sleeping:

[Jimothy51]

95. Gigidy Gigidy Gi

[Caricature]

#96 I was just tested positive.

[cueeball]

97) Next time i think ill do it myself, like mother like daughter

[propea]

98- Is it in yet?

[Allergic]

99 - "neg reps"

[troutflosser]

100. You Got Punk'd!

[Mr. Heskey]

101. You know I was born in Africa right?

[Shananagens]

102: *Turns on tv* Hmmm, wonder what the weather is going to be like.

[scribbles321]

Your dog was better.

[familyguy1121]

57.- That was great. Now, Fuck off, bitch.

NOOOOO! THATS WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY!
If you don't say that, then YOU'RE NOT SUPPISH!

http://uploads.ungrounded.net/content.php?id=78995&name=78995_johnny.swf&title=Johnny%20Rocketfingers&date=1119240000&quality=b&uj=0&w=400&h=300


read the loading screen.

;)

[lilbradley24]

(man) so ur doing this to borrow the car,huh?
(woman) yes
(man) ok nice.. keep on sucking..
(woman) your dick taste like shit..
after*
(man) oh what is today?
(woman) Monday, why?
(man) my brother has the car today

[skabass13]

105. What's your name again..... Brian Peppers?!?

[Stretch82]

106: HA!!!...I win!!

[modestdarkness]

107. smile your on candid camera.
108. looks like jaws 3 down there.

[TurbulenceXM]

109. Let me tell you a story about herpes.....

[sNiPe_]

110 (if female) is it in yet?

111 (if gay male) is it in yet?

[JuliaAguilar]

112. Would you pass me that dildo over there? I need to finish the job you started.

113. (to someone hiding in the closet) Son ... did you learn enough about the birds and the bees from that?

114. I have to ask ... haven't you ever thought about getting that mole removed?

115. ZZZZZZZZZ .... Wha ..? Oh, it's over? Okay. Thanks for letting me know.

116. Of the 26 men I've been with, including you, you're like ... 25th.

117. Wow! Now I can add you to my total! That makes 58!

118. Smile! You're on Candid Camera!

[whocares]

119. Make me a sandwich, bitch.

[esruC]

120. What's that smell?

121. Damn, this itches......

[Solid Snake]

122. (to a boy/girlfriend) What do you wanna name our children?

[Camaro33]

#123 hey marie...we can NOT tell mom, okay?

[Arkilies]

124. Don't worry, it's natural.

[Arkilies]

125. Leave now, my wife will be here any minute.

[macdyneZ]

126. I'm Black?

[blahblahblah___]

127. Consider masturbation

[teamdescent]

128. Your 18 right?

[modestdarkness]

129. H-h-h-headshot

[s3xyjesus]

130. Bwhahaha, you're famous now! I got you on cam bitch! :D

[BlankMan]

131.Do you have a phone I need to call my wife.

[firedragon]

132. • You're so much like your sister....
133. • Your mom's cute.
134. • What's your name again?
135. • Do i have to be here in the morning?
136. • But everybody looks funny naked!
137. • You woke me up for that?
138. • Did I mention the video camera?
139. • Do you smell something burning?
140. • A little rug burn never hurt anyone!
141. • Is that a Medic-Alert Pendant?
142. • Can you please pass me the remote control?
143. • Do you accept Visa?
144. • On second thought, let's turn off the lights.
145. • And to think- I was really trying to pick up your friend!
146. • (using body paint) Try not to leave any stains, okay?
147. • Hope you're as good looking when I'm sober...
148. • Do you get any premium movie channels?
149. • Try not to smear my make-up, will ya!
150. • Got any penicillin?
151. • But I just brushed my teeth...
152. • I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs!
153. • So much for the fulfillment of sexual fantasies!
154. • Did you know the ceiling needs painting?
155. • I think you have it on backwards.
156. • When is this supposed to feel good?
157. • Put that blender back in the kitchen where it belongs!
158. • You're good enough to do this for a living!
159. • Is that blood on the headboard?
160. • Did I remember to take my pill?
161. • Are you sure I don't know you from somewhere?
162. • I wish we got the Playboy channel...
163. • I told you it wouldn't work without batteries!
164. • Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?
165. • No, really... I do this part better myself!
166. • It's nice being in bed with a woman I don't have to inflate!
167. • This would be more fun with a few more people..
168. • Do you know the definition of statutory rape?
169. • Is that you I smell or is it your mattress stuffed with rotten potatoes?
170. • You look younger than you feel.
171. • Perhaps you're just out of practice.
172. • You sweat more than a galloping stallion!
173. • They're not cracker crumbs, it's just a rash.
174. • Now I know why he/she dumped you...
175. • Does your husband own a sawed-off shotgun?
176. • You give me reason to conclude that foreplay is overrated.
177. • What tampon?
178. • Have you ever considered liposuction?
179. • And to think, I didn't even have to buy you dinner!
180. • What are you planning to make for breakfast?
181. • I was so horny tonight I would have taken a duck home!
182. • Are those real or am I just behind the times?
183. • Were you by any chance repressed as a child?
184. • Is that a hanging sculpture?
185. • You'll still vote for me, won't you?
186. • Did I mention my transsexual operation?
187. • I really hate women who actually think sex means something!
188. • Did you come yet, dear?
189. • I'll tell you who I'm fanatasizing about if you tell me who you're fantasizing about...
190. • A good plastic surgeon can take care of that in no time!
191. • Does this count as a date?
192. • Hic! I need another beer for this please.
193. • I think biting is romantic- don't you?
194. • Man: Maybe it would help if I thought about someone I really like...
Woman: Yourself?
195. • Have you seen "Fatal Attraction"?
196. • Sorry about the name tags, I'm not very good with names.
197. • Don't mind me.. I always file my nails in bed.
198. • Sorry but I don't do toes!
199. • You could at least ACT like you're enjoying it!
200. • Petroleum jelly or no petroleum jelly, I said NO!
201. • I'll bet you didn't know I work for "The Enquirer".
202. • So that's why they call you MR. Flash!
203. • Is this a sin too?
204. • Hey, when is it going to be my friend's turn?
205. • Long kisses clog my sinuses...
206. • Please understand that I'm only doing this for a raise...
207. • How long do you plan to be "almost there"?
208. • You mean you're NOT my blind date?
209. • Is it in?
210. • That's it?
211. • You've got to be kidding me.
212. • (phone rings) hello? oh nothing and you?
213. • Do i have to pay for this?
214. • Do i have to call you tomorrow?
215. • Oh momma, momma!
216. • Oh dadda, dadda!
217. • You look better in the dark. 11)i thought that goes in the other hole....
218. • Don't tell my husband/wife.
219. • You have the same bra my mom does (worse if the girl says it).
220. • This sucks.
221. • Can you finish now? i have a meeting...
222. • I hope you don't expect a raise for this...
223. • I think you might get the job for this.
224. • Damn! is that all you know what to do.
225. • Did I tell you, i have herpes?
226. • Hurry up, the games about to start.
227. • zzzzzzzzzzzz.
228. • Are you trying to be funny?
229. • Can i have a ride home after this?
230. • By the way, i want to break up.
231. • Haven't you ever done this before?
232. • Wow!! i've never seen those before (then grope wildly).
233. • Do you know what some female spiders do after sex?
234. • A second time? i barely stayed awake the first time!
235. • You're about as good as a 9 year old, and i should know!!
236. • Can we order a pizza?
237. • I think my dad is listening at the door.
238. • Smile for the camera, honey!!!
239. • Take off that damn monkey glove!!
240. • Get your hand out of there!!
241. • I think the condom broke 10 minutes ago.
242. • I knew you wore a padded bra!!
243. • Cover me boys, I'm going in!!!
244. • DIVE! DIVE! DIVE!
245. • Fire one!
246. • God, that is small!!
247. • Hold on, let me change the channel...
248. • Who smells like fish?
249. • Is it o.k. if my mom (and/or dad) joins in?
250. • Your best-friend does it much better.
251. • Hurry up, the motor's runnin'.
252. • You're fogging up the wind-sheild.
253. • Can i borrow 5 bucks?
254. • What the hell noise was that?!
255. • Stop moaning, you sound so stupid.
256. • Shut up, bitch! (worse if the girl says it)
257. • You know, you're not really attractive.
258. • I'm sorry, i was not listening.
259. • What, oh yea, i love you too, now let me concentrate!!
260. • Stop interrupting me!!
261. • I have to take a crap.
262. • Did i leave the iron on?
263. • Your breath is funky.
264. • It's ok honey, i can imagine that its bigger.
265. • God i wish you were a real woman.
266. • Why can't you ever shave your legs?
267. • By the way, when i drove over here, i ran over your dog....
268. • Oh susan, susan... i mean donna.... shoot.
269. • Your breast milk is like my mom's....
270. • You're hairy!!
271. • Is it o.k. if i never see you again?
272. • Did I forget to tell you I got worms from my cat?
273. • Don't make that face at me!
274. • All of a sudden i have a headache.
275. • You're boring.
276. • How much do i owe you?
277. • How come we each have a penis?
278. • Of course you can't be on top, you're too fat, you'll kill me!
279. • Just use your finger, its bigger.
280. • Does your family have to watch?
281. • We'll try again later when you can satisfy me too.
282. • Get off me, i'll do it myself!!!!
283. • You're as soft as a sheep, inside and out.
284. • The only reason i'm doing this is because i'm drunk.
285. • My mom taught me this.....
286. • How cute... peach fuzz!
287. • Damn girl! My breasts are bigger than yours!
288. • Should i ask why you're bleeding?
289. • This is my pet rat, larry....
290. • I haven't had this much sex since i was a hooker!
291. • I was once a woman...
292. • Wanna see me take out my glass eye?
293. • No i don't love your mind, i can't grab that!!
294. • Is it o.k. if i tell my friends about this?
295. • I'm sobering up and you're getting ugly!
296. • You wanted me to use a condom?
297. • You're no better than my brother!!
298. • Mooooo!!
299. • Fire in the hole!!!
300. • I wanna see how many quarters i can fit in there.
301. • Hurry up, i'm late for a date.
302. • OK start...oh! that feels so... YOU'RE DONE??!!
303. • I'm out of condoms, can i use a sock?
304. • Don't squirm, you'll spill my beer.
305. • Did i tell you where my cold sore came from?
306. • (Start reciting the 10 commandments).
307. • I think I just crapped on your bed.
308. • Of course I don't love you.
309. • Let me spell it out for you, b-r-e-a-t-h m-i-n-t.

[Solid Snake]

310. You're a waste of sperm.

[Sonic_Fan]

311: ... Hey, wait a minute! You're my sister!

[blahblahblah___]

What the fuck are you still doing here?

[modestdarkness]

312. Your vagina just swallowed my penis.

[Roland]

313: WOW the carpet really does match the drapes!

[modestdarkness]

314. You suck.
315. safety.
Edit: thought of some more
316. Ahh so ugly, please take off that mask.
317. (Say this to someone with very long pubic hair.) So what is it with you and 2 layers of panties?

[Camaro33]

#318
*after honey moon*
i take it i get a discount for being the husbands best man right?

[moose]

319. Hey your kind of cute on uh second that would it be alright if I uh pissed in your butt....alright thanks

[esruC]

320. Good, Good. Now fuck this goat....

[gUy]

321: Oh shit, I forgot to tell you ...

(dont know if that has been posted)

[modestdarkness]

trust me it has in like 20 diffrent ways.
322. Hallo i are pihay.

[Stardust]

323. So, if it's a boy do you want to name him after your dad or mine?

[SirRobin]

324.) You're fired!

[bobooh17]

325) I slept with #324 and he was way better

[modestdarkness]

326. Shut up! Just shut up. *walks out door* hehe stella is funny.
327. WTF?!??! ROFL!!! LOL!!! BRB!!!!BIATCH!!!!
328. What time does your legs open again?
329. So was it supposed to be boring?
330. Ahh your ugly

[Jimothy51]

331. Your grandpa was better.

[OmnicientEye]

332: Did I tell you I got this rash from your mom?
333:Ok, once again, this time with feeling.

[pihay]

334; Actually my real name is pihay.

[Idmir]

335: I wish you were pihay :shuffle:

[plokhoe]

336: i like your ceiling

[OmnicientEye]

337: yes, I finally screwed you, that guy ows me 20 bucks...oh wait I didn't just say that out load did I?

[Caricature]

338: I got 178 STD's, 17 of which are only found in sharks.

[JuliaAguilar]

338: I got 178 STD's, 17 of which are only found in sharks.

Wasn't that from a Saturday Night Live sketch? Where they made James Bond call all the women he was with and tell them?

[navid]

339 whew! okay now lets do it with a german accent.

[mORBism]

340 - This has been the best birthday ever grandma.

[MegaSuperdude]

341. Wow! Were gonna have some fucked up kids!
342. Alright! Now calling #23!
343. Ah, my wife's here to pick me up, bye.

[Matt the Fierce]

344. And that's the story of how I got separated from my family, oh wait--your last name is Kirkpatrick too?

[modestdarkness]

345. Ok now put on this paper bag and we shall try again.

[Dawggidog]

your sister was better

or

lets just be friends

[macdyneZ]

Live from New York, it's saturday night!

[FFGG33]

349. (Guy rolls off, satisfied after shoving it all in her)
Girl: Are you going to put it all in or not?

[The_Arcade_Fire]

350: now run upstairs and finish your homework
351: and now to deflate you and put you back in your box

[YulFolge]

352. Well, that was fun! Now, allow me to tell you a story. Ready? Good! Ah-hem...In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth...

353. Okay, we've done it in the pet cemetary, the pre-school, the library, the It's a Small World ride, while watching The Little Mermaid, under the Christmas tree, on top of the Christmas tree, in my parents bed, in your parents death bed, and during a taping of The Tony Danza Show, what's next?

354. Hmmmm... :shuffle: this would probably be better if I wasn't alone. :(

[MiKe]

355. Hey....What's that smell?

356. [guy rolls over onto stomach and pisses himself]. Do you feel all warm and gooey too?

356. Wasn't I wearing a condom?

[ralphy]

357. geee mum didnt recognise you without your moustache

[MiKe]

358. Ooooowwwwwwwww!!!!! It Burns!!!! It Buuuurrrnnnnnss!!!!!

[solarina]

Wow, so many family guy quotes...

359. Is it cold in here?
360. Listen, I've got school in an hour so either you help me with my homework or I've gotta go...
361. Did you know there was once this woman on Oprah that pretended she was a man? When her girlfriend got into bed they turned off the lights and the girl used a dildo to make it seem like it was her. Apparently, the girlfriend didn't notice at all! But um... enough about that. How was I?
362. Seriously, it was like throwing a hotdog down a hallway!
363. Um, I've gotta go now. *Steals shoe* MMMMMM.... This one's a keeper.

[JuliaAguilar]

364. Hey, get off of me ... I have to put the cucumber back in the fridge now.

[_Joe]

365.
Uncle: "You mean your dad didn't do that with you? That lyin' bastard!"

[hitsfromthebong]

366) honestly.....is that the best you got ?

[Roland]

367) heh, now to take you back to the morgue

[_Joe]

In honor of two straight Chappel avis:

368:

What did the five fingas say to the face?





.







.







.







.





*point to door*
leave 'fore i finish the joke, bitch!

[t3h_bob]

"Man"(chick): god, that strap on was killing me.

"Woman"(gay guy): Thank god I got that sex change in time for this.

All the good quotes have already been posted. :(

[Life On Mars]

Soooo.... Whats your name again?

[Losing Grip On]

Whew!....for a second there I thought the Viagra up my bung hole was a bad idea

[S10000]

#370

Now go make me a sandwich bitch

[Tavis_Padraic]

#371
Girl: Woof Woof

[camilo]

#372
wipe your ass better for the next time. I can barely breath

[bmotds]

373. hmmmm, I wonder what you'd look like with a big ole' cylindrical moustache...you might want to close your eyes for this

[DrProf]

374. *takes out phone and dials number*
"haha, pay up, fool!"

[Camaro33]

375~*turns to partner*
you know, i love doing you more than i do taffy
and i'm a man you enjoys his taffy
*opens bar of taffy*
*mmmmm* *ohhh* *ahhh*
*smacks lips*, oh yes...

[tabber]

376. Don't tell mommy.

377. Stop barking.

[Eat Kids]

378. You were better then my dog!

[Zooch]

379. *To wife* Good god Frank, that was great!

[Balders]

351: and now to deflate you and put you back in your box

Ha. Comedy gold. My turn... err...

380. Thanks for a wonderful time Steve...

[modestdarkness]

here are sum from a friend
368. Do those come in any other shade of blue?
369. Did that get the sand out?
some of mine
370. maybe i should bring vinegar and tartar sauce for those crabs.
371. DAYUM! How drunk/high was i.
372. bitchass hoe go back to your corner. BIATCH!.
373. your ass got owned bitch.

[Pig]

374. Oh, you've spotted the camera..

[Asatica]

heres a couple:

375 - You woke me up for that?
376 - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
377 - I want a baby
378 - On second thoughts, lets turn off the lights
379 - No, really.....i do this part better myself

[Chuck U. Farley]

380. Damn girl, yo fish smells like pussy.

[ihatecrazyfrog]

im a celebrity get me out of here ?
*shouting*its like a jungle in there(think its out of a movie)

[Camaro33]

[husband]~ oh you're cold honey, i'll hold ya

~ dad, its chris

[husband]~ go to your room...

[amz]

how about oh shit wrong house,wrong girl bye bye got to run

[TheWonderWeezel]

how about oh shit wrong house,wrong girl bye bye got to run

Dude, why the fuck did you even post?

Who would go through all that crap and make an account just to post that bullshit. Your worse than females. If you are female.........*slap*

381 - That was good. Want to hear 1000 things not to say after sex?
382 - Aww, good boy! Now roll over!
383 - Habbllllllleeeeeeeeeoffffff cab shnop duuuuh ANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDER afff afffff afffffffffffffffffffffffffff jew cockado FUCK jewannnnnnnnnna a a a a locolocoba jobby owooooooooooo. Wouldnt it suck if something said that to you after sex?
384- I give it a 4. now get the fuck outta my house.

[chickenbreath]

385. lets go on ebaums world

[Well Me]

386. Uh what just happened?

[horny]

387.you fucking suck

[MiKe]

388. I think I just.....yep. I just shit myself. You mind wiping?

[horny]

389.wooo yeah highfive (then puts hand up for a high five)

[MiKe]

This will never make it to 1000. I'm out.

[modestdarkness]

390. time to pull out the hacks.
391. REPOST

[ndn_goat]

392. haha youve been punked. It was a fake condom

[Shiggedyswa]

392. haha youve been punked. It was a fake condom
Awsome




393: I have something to tell you.... I'm not a women I'm a horse. I have something else to tell you... I'm not a horse I'm a broom.

[Pollo]

394: Can you spell AIDS?

[Mattjam]

395: Good boy, lucky, want a doggy treat?

[strikeandburn]

396: gah.. ur grandma was better

[poopchow]

397. Next time dont scream for help ok? Its really a mood killer

[wongee]

398. can you feel the difference?

[Well Me]

399. Smell that? oh...crap...please tell me i didnt just do that...
400. Wooo we've reached 400! Dont ask, though.

[grumpkin]

401.) ahhhh.... :rolleyes: I gotta take a dump..

[strikeandburn]

402: ok mom, turn over

[AC/DC Rocks!!!!]

403: ehh had

[AC/DC Rocks!!!!]

403: ehh had better

[OnandOn]

Is it in yet?

[Jimothy51]

404: I'm trying to think of something clever to say, but all the good ones were taken.

[zachay066]

405. So what does your mom look like??

[t3h_bob]

406. So... Ehh Sexy.. Wanna tell me where babies come from?

[jimmymac63]

407. ...Damn that was great baby, I have to go to my sex offenders meeting. Be back later!

[Stardust]

408. So....you already had AIDS, right?

[Trismo]

**mown**did we just fucked?

[dudeinanigloo]

410. Excuse me, honey, I need to call my wife... :thud:

[ihatecrazyfrog]

Dont know if anyone has posted this but here's mine: You've been punk'd :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

[Shiggedyswa]

I don't know if this has been posted...

412. well... i'd have to say your mom was a little more experienced.

[CheeseMonkeys]

I don't know if this has been posted...

412. well... i'd have to say your mom was a little more experienced.

413. well... i'd have to say your DAD was a little more experienced.

[Sheep]

414. How much do I owe you?

[Shiggedyswa]

413. well... i'd have to say your DAD was a little more experienced.

415. Well... it came close between your dog and your turtle but... I would have to say that your turtle was the most experienced.

[horny]

416. erm can you please get out of my house now
417.dont call or expect me to call you
418.not as good as pihay

[Trismo]

man:damn, well now to complete face 2 of my dead plan
woman:what
man:im gona die
woma:why
man:aids
woman: :eek:

[Camaro33]

420

husband~ that was fantastic honey

wife~mmmm, indeed

husband~ya know, from back here you look like our daughter

wife~...

[horny]

421.you taste like pihay
422.you look like pihay
423.you smell like pihay
424.you should get somthing done about that fungal toenail infection

[MyChemRomance77]

425. ah.. my dog was better!

[John's Peter]

426. Jiggle that rump darling, your crack is full of crumbs and popcorn from the sofa.

[xXNoMeRcYXx]

427. Hey My friends ARE right you DO like it like that.

[zzero]

428 - You're hot, but your mom does that thing with her tongue

[Viking_God]

Let me know if you find a way to treat that rash you're about to get.

[horny]

430. i should have stayed at home

[John's Peter]

Phew! (gasping for air) You really ought to desinfect that thing. I don't know if it's your ass or your pussy that stinks, but girl, for god's sake, use bleach on both sides.

[iLLmatiK]

432. Fuck you.

Nice and simple :)

[ndn_goat]

431. You called that a handjob!? Next time, ill do it myself.

[Finity]

434: Now you are married to me according to the contract you wrote before we did it. :banghead:


Another victim of commitment...

[deathtorap]

435. Lol....pwned.........brb.

[TheScarecrow]

436. I Finally Lost My Virginity

[TORCH]

437. Don't tell anyone or I'll fucking kill you! Oh... sorry. Forgot you agreed to it!

438. Shit, I don't think my camcorder has night vision. Wanna try it with the lights on?

439. You should get checked out. Your sister was complaining of burning down there!

440. Wait, who the fuck are you?!?!

[dojob]

441. HEY YOUR NOT MY MOTHER!!!!!

442. OMG \/@G!|\|@ |-|@kD

[brohar]

442. brb, the guys on ebaums wont believe this.

[jimjam5000]

443: i like the internet better

[veeDuB]

444. you posh bitch!, you gave me lobsters!

[Lady_Alexiel]

445. hey why isn't the poison working??? oh did I tell you I'm a necrophiliac?

[beardo]

446. My doctor said not to have sex without protection so i wont pass on my STD, luckily i wore a helmet

[Well Me]

447. Didnt i say to use a condom? Oh wait im the one with the penis. OOOOOPS.

[a_brainless_guy]

448)well,I should get at least $50 for this video on the internet..


edit- sorry if this has already been said but i'm too lazy to read though the past 450 post's..

[Wolfy]

449) *cries* I'm so emotional. That was truely superb work, props to you *cries* I don't know what the critics will say! Great performance.

450) I'll be back. (Terminater Style)

[Jk1725]

451 *yawn* i just had the most amazing nap

[SablimineL]

452.

I have to go, my wife is expecting me for dinner.

[stinger4life]

453.

Ive had better sex with a rabbit
(guy who got arrested for screwing rabbits :D)

[Beldar]

454: (during sex) Get off, i'll do it myself!

[Supermintyfresh]

455: This our little secret. Ok? Don't tell your mommy or daddy.

[FrozenMonkey]

456: OK, so let's NOT tell mom...

[MPMaster]

457: I'm actually you in the future. except that your a dog.

[El Jarretto]

458. You could learn from my dog.

[strikeandburn]

.ahhh, finally i fucked over 500 girls

*500th post(proud noob)*

[ZeroTigerX]

560. Wait.... you're not sarah!


561.Wher'd you come from?

[ManiSiu]

562 . lemme change the channel