View Full Version : Impossible Questions of DOOM
SoulS Sword
06-07-2005, 04:54 PM
Some things to think about:
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but
it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the
clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we
figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"
when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
How come we choose from just two people for President
and fifty for Miss America?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I
think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink
whatever comes out!"
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being
would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
When your photo is taken for your driver's license,
why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by
the police and asked for your license, are you going
to be smiling?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
stupid song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio
out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the
time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask
where the bathroom is?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?
If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality
come from morons?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a
mouse?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a
car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
Ms June Day
06-07-2005, 05:01 PM
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
They know to much :eek:
SUPERCAN711
06-07-2005, 05:08 PM
some of them were kinda stupid, but i liked the first two and the alphabet one, miss america one, and the building one, and i thought that the cow one was funny
SoulS Sword
06-07-2005, 05:16 PM
yeah, these were pretty funny. Anyone got more? :D
Tomarse
06-07-2005, 06:29 PM
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
If the police arrest a mime, does he still have the right to remain silent?
Do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If a pit bull humps your leg you’d better fake an orgasm.
Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you’re a twat.
Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you’ll be right.
The easiest way to find something that’s lost is to buy a replacement.
How come when you open a can of evaporated milk it’s still there?
Why is there only one Monopolies commission?
If a thing is worth doing, it would have been done already.
Guns don't kill people - Husbands who come home early kill people.
Why do you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed?
Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic?
Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?
Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
i know its not exactly the same but is along the same line
SoulS Sword
06-07-2005, 06:38 PM
^haha! those are funny
SUPERCAN711
06-07-2005, 07:41 PM
haha those are really good
esruC
06-07-2005, 07:50 PM
What's a twat? Some crazy British word? :insane:
SoulS Sword
06-07-2005, 07:59 PM
Twat? where does it say twat?
esruC
06-07-2005, 08:05 PM
Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you’re a twat.
Sooooo.... What's a twat?
evil joe
06-07-2005, 08:43 PM
Those are pretty funny, and I think a twat is the opposite of a tawt...
SoulS Sword
06-07-2005, 08:52 PM
sooooo.....whats a tawt?
291099001
06-07-2005, 10:56 PM
Haha you don't know what a twat is.
Go here: http://images.google.com/
search "twat"
johnnycupcakes
06-07-2005, 11:07 PM
Haha you don't know what a twat is.
Go here: http://images.google.com/
search "twat"
http://images.google.com/images?q=twat&hl=en&btnG=Search+Images
yeah....that really helped.
291099001
06-08-2005, 12:15 AM
Okay, then go here: http://www.google.com
and search "goatse"
Then click the result called "Eh?"
Kempai
06-08-2005, 02:42 AM
That's an ass, not a twat :sleeping: A twat is a cunt.
291099001
06-08-2005, 10:26 AM
How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Assasinated = Killed by someone hired.
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Only a name.
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Who said that the meat has to be the same shape as the bread? There is Square meat as well out there, you know.
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but
it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Me. I have over $1, 000, 000 in people's pennies
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the
clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Nope, you get naked and do it all the time.
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
So fuckbrains think that it's bigger. Besisdes, who'd pay to prodice round boxes...
What disease did cured ham actually have?
Herpes
How is it that we put man on the moon before we
figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
You see, back then luggage was nothing but prostitutes in a briefcase.
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"
when babies wake up like every two hours?
If you know anything, you'd know that a baby sleeps the whole day.
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
This one was so stupid it made me laugh.
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
No, if they do, you could sue them and get millions.
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
What does this phrase tell you? "Then these three indian guys came onto the screen..."
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Because they love the cock.
How come we choose from just two people for President
and fifty for Miss America?
Because people like to choose from many hot chicks.
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
Would you feel comftorable if someone stared at you while you took your pants off? Then your shirt and then the undergarments? You would?! EEEW.
Besides, I think they are getting papers of some sort while yo do it.
If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
Rescue Heroes
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Because orange juice raped your father.
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
WTF?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I
think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink
whatever comes out!"
Farmer Tamm of West Greghtsham. He thought it was a mutation so he attempted to jack off the cow. He was a sick fuck, you know, so he drank the white stuff that came out.
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being
would eat?
There are different bread types. Some are made to resist nuclear war!
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Because your penis is small.
When your photo is taken for your driver's license,
why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by
the police and asked for your license, are you going
to be smiling?
It's just common sense. You want to look like a 40 year old goat rapist in your driver's license? Be my guest.
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
stupid song about him?
Jimmy is your father.
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
Wha-- What the fuck?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio
out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
He loves the cock as well, my friend.
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the
time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask
where the bathroom is?
I do. :O
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!
Hahaha!
What do you call male ballerinas?[b]
Fags :)
[b]Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?
That one was the only one that had me thinking. I have no answer to that.
If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
He wanted some genuine roarrunner action, not some cheap chicken whore.
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
Jizz. Is that what you wanted to hear?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality
come from morons?
Correct.
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a
mouse?
Yes, I saw his face. His ears appear everywhere.
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
Indeed, monkey masturbation.
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
It makes my penis all hard.
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
WTF you got asteroids up your ass?!
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a
car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
It's obvious, he thinks your breath smells like chicken penis so he sticks his head out to escape the smell.
Christov
06-08-2005, 10:40 AM
How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Assasinated = Killed by someone hired.
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Only a name.
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Who said that the meat has to be the same shape as the bread? There is Square meat as well out there, you know.
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but
it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Me. I have over $1, 000, 000 in people's pennies
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the
clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Nope, you get naked and do it all the time.
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
So fuckbrains think that it's bigger. Besisdes, who'd pay to prodice round boxes...
What disease did cured ham actually have?
Herpes
How is it that we put man on the moon before we
figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
You see, back then luggage was nothing but prostitutes in a briefcase.
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"
when babies wake up like every two hours?
If you know anything, you'd know that a baby sleeps the whole day.
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
This one was so stupid it made me laugh.
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
No, if they do, you could sue them and get millions.
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
What does this phrase tell you? "Then these three indian guys came onto the screen..."
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Because they love the cock.
How come we choose from just two people for President
and fifty for Miss America?
Because people like to choose from many hot chicks.
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
Would you feel comftorable if someone stared at you while you took your pants off? Then your shirt and then the undergarments? You would?! EEEW.
Besides, I think they are getting papers of some sort while yo do it.
If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
Rescue Heroes
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Because orange juice raped your father.
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
WTF?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I
think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink
whatever comes out!"
Farmer Tamm of West Greghtsham. He thought it was a mutation so he attempted to jack off the cow. He was a sick fuck, you know, so he drank the white stuff that came out.
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being
would eat?
There are different bread types. Some are made to resist nuclear war!
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Because your penis is small.
When your photo is taken for your driver's license,
why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by
the police and asked for your license, are you going
to be smiling?
It's just common sense. You want to look like a 40 year old goat rapist in your driver's license? Be my guest.
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
stupid song about him?
Jimmy is your father.
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
Wha-- What the fuck?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio
out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
He loves the cock as well, my friend.
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the
time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask
where the bathroom is?
I do. :O
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!
Hahaha!
What do you call male ballerinas?[b]
Fags :)
[b]Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?
That one was the only one that had me thinking. I have no answer to that.
If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
He wanted some genuine roarrunner action, not some cheap chicken whore.
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
Jizz. Is that what you wanted to hear?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality
come from morons?
Correct.
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a
mouse?
Yes, I saw his face. His ears appear everywhere.
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
Indeed, monkey masturbation.
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
It makes my penis all hard.
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
WTF you got asteroids up your ass?!
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a
car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
It's obvious, he thinks your breath smells like chicken penis so he sticks his head out to escape the smell.
I have just soiled myself laughing.
SoulS Sword
06-08-2005, 06:21 PM
^^HAHA! That is just so great! you are cool!
Remiss
06-08-2005, 06:50 PM
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but
it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Taxes....
SoulS Sword
06-08-2005, 07:20 PM
a couple of your anwsers i did not get.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Because orange juice raped your father.
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Because your penis is small.
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
Indeed, monkey masturbation.
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Because they love the cock.
:wtf: :wtf: :wtf:
evil joe
06-08-2005, 08:44 PM
Found this on urbandictionary.com:
1. TWAT
1) A great word to shout out.
2) A woman's vagina.
3) A blow to the face or genitalia.
4) Used by Tweety.
5) An offensive term for a person.
6) Acronym for The War Against Terrorism.
1) "You're getting right on my tits you TWAAAAAAAAT!"
2) "Nice twat there woman."
3) "You twatted me, I'll twat you back."
4) "Where's dat liddle puddy twat?"
5) "Tony Blair's a twat."
6) "TWAT is going well, don't you think?"
doorknobopener
06-10-2005, 03:31 AM
the one with Miss America and the president is that their is other canidates on the ballet. The independent party.
the freezer with no light bulb question, they started putting light bulbs in them.
Thats all I know so far.
strikeandburn
06-11-2005, 01:01 AM
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets? this one is pissing me off, i'm sick of seeing this on websites like that. is it not obvious they communicated with eachother with there helmets? duh
And
they kamikaze'd when they had no bombs left, and not enough fuel to get back to there base or there plane could be damaged and they would go down anyway so they would take more people down with them..
VegitoSSJ4
06-11-2005, 02:04 AM
Some things to think about:
Can you cry under water?
Yes I've done it before when i was little, it didnt work very well
How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Very
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Cause a branch also meaans a section of something
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Cause they're money hungry bastards.
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but
it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Hookers
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the
clothes you were buried in for eternity?
No you get an ugly white robe with a halo and wings
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
Just like the sandwich meat, they are money hungry and it saves money.
What disease did cured ham actually have?
It had the Gonnarota Soona disease
How is it that we put man on the moon before we
figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Cause we are stupid
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"
when babies wake up like every two hours?
Cause its a metaphor, and metaphors=gay
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Yes, but he wont be hearing it
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
Yes you do, I read this biography about a guy working at coke was caught with a pepsi.
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Cause being IN a girl is better then ON a hobo, just change Girl to movie and hobo to TV
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Cause they're idiots.
How come we choose from just two people for President
and fifty for Miss America?
Cause Girls are awesome
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
Its respectful and they like to see you naked
If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
911 duhh
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Cause we want it to be
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
Do literate people get an effect from alphabet?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I
think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink
whatever comes out!"
A very very very very very very perverted person
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being
would eat?
I like burning bread, it burns my face off
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Cause no one needs a light in a freezer and fridges like to feel special
When your photo is taken for your driver's license,
why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by
the police and asked for your license, are you going
to be smiling?
Cause they love to make you squirm
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
stupid song about him?
Who is Kimmy and why does he crack corn, btw that just sounds wrong, crack corn. *shudders*
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
Corpses are people too :shout:
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio
out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Cause that would make the series end and the money would go kapoowee
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the
time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask
where the bathroom is?
Cause people dont stick their finger up their butt when they need a gay mate.
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!
CAUSE ITS A FRIGGIN TV SHOW!
What do you call male ballerinas?
Male ballerinas.
Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?
They feel their dreams, or maybe thats just their privates...
If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Cause he is a friggin Cartoon character
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
babies, what else!?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality
come from morons?
I gotzed lotsa of moralimaty
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a
mouse?
Yes
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
Yes
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Cause im an idiot
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
cause hemo=blood and a hemorrhoid is when theres blood in your ass or somethin else
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a
car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
U like it when you scratch your balls but would you like someone else to scratch them? unless you're gay
i answered all the questions ^^
scribbles321
06-11-2005, 02:20 AM
=Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?
That one was the only one that had me thinking. I have no answer to that
It depends. If they were born blind, they dream with their other 4 senses. If they go blind in an accident, but they used to able to see, they are able to see in their dreams.
Somethingevil
06-11-2005, 02:54 AM
Since i have nothing better to do, I'll try answering these questions
Can you cry under water?
Yes.
How important does a person have to be before they are
considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
When they have political powers.
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
The hemp in money is grown on plants.
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
So you dont get fat.
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but
it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Taxes
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the
clothes you were buried in for eternity?
No, because pepetual bliss would mean that you must have a choice of clothing!
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
It's easier to make square boxes.
What disease did cured ham actually have?
Hunger.
How is it that we put man on the moon before we
figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Blame the government on this one.
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"
when babies wake up like every two hours?
The two hours or less that they actually sleep looks peaceful.
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
No, it's called a trial! (This answer is stupid)
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
They can't fire you for drinking Pepsi, but they will take in account each mistake you make... So basically even the smallest mistake will get you in trouble.
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Movies are longer, so you can FIT into it.
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Because this society demands that we spent money! Think about it, haven't you ever had a time where you seemed to waste money on something worthless?
How come we choose from just two people for President
and fifty for Miss America?
Miss America is more important.
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
Because they have other work to attend to.
If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
Another 911 operator.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Because the English language is one giant flaw! Just look at all the other grammer rules for English!
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
Yes, because no one actually tries and spell out words or notices certain words in Alphabet Soup.
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I
think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink
whatever comes out!"
A zoophiliac person.
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being
would eat?
For eating your house in winter when your furnace dies.
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Because people don't open up the freezer in the middle of the night for a midnight snack. If they're going to open up the freezer, it means they're planning on preparing something big, so assuming they're doing that. They'll probably have the lights in the kitchen turned on.
When your photo is taken for your driver's license,
why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by
the police and asked for your license, are you going
to be smiling?
If you're drinking and driving you might be.
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
stupid song about him?
Because everyone seems to have the right to write songs! Just look at Hilary Duff for goodness sakes!
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
There are usually two living people driving a hearse, because first of all, no one wants to be with a dead person by themselves. Secondly, a coffin is pretty heavy for one person.
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio
out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Boats have to be able to sustain the force of the water as well as the wait of the passangers on board. The radio doesn't have to be that strong.
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the
time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask
where the bathroom is?
I point at my crotch to ask when to go to the bathroom.
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
fours? They're both dogs!
Goofy is a cow.
What do you call male ballerinas?
Male ballerinas...
Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?
They can't see dreams, but they have dreams about their other working senses, such as hearing, smelling, touch, taste.
However, a person that at one point in their life had vision and lost it due to some sort of accident may have dreams of being able to see.
If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Because buying ACME equipment cost a lot of money, so it'd be worth it for the delivery man to drive all the out into that desert, because they'd be making a profit! However, no regular pizza delivery boy is going out there just to earn $20 for a pizza!
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
Chemicals...
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality
come from morons?
Yes.
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a
mouse?
No, Disney Land as well.
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
Yes.
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
I didn't, I visualized the tunes in my head.
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Don't you mean atmosphere? Hemisphere is basically what quadrant you're located on Earth. For example, Canada is North of the equator, and West of the Prime Meridian.
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a
car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
Because when your blow, some spit lands on him, which is pretty gross and uncomfortable!
And now i have proven that i offically have no life!
SoulS Sword
06-11-2005, 12:39 PM
oooookkkkkk then. anyone got anymore? :D
leprecon
06-11-2005, 12:44 PM
Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
french kissing has nothing to do with france
nor do french fries, they're from belgium
Get used to it
---- Yay, useless first post !
SoulS Sword
06-11-2005, 12:49 PM
---- Yay, useless first post !
another hard question:
Q: is he happy about his useless first post?
A: the world may never know....
canadianbacon58
06-11-2005, 02:33 PM
A twat is vernacular english for the female genitalia (vagina).
leprecon
06-11-2005, 03:51 PM
another hard question:
Q: is he happy about his useless first post?
A: Don't care enough about my first post
eadgbe
06-14-2005, 07:59 PM
more:
if 7-11 is open 24-hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
is it illegal to steal someone else's shopping cart and then just buy their stuff?
if a turtle loses its shell, is it homeless or naked?
why do people drive on parkways and park on driveways?
why is stuff in a truck called a shipment, and why is stuff on a ship called cargo?
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Only 3 shots and your on the floor? Light-weight.
evil joe
07-03-2005, 05:49 PM
more:
if 7-11 is open 24-hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
They lock the doors on the 29th of february every leap year
is it illegal to steal someone else's shopping cart and then just buy their stuff?
sure, why not
if a turtle loses its shell, is it homeless or naked?
It would be dead.
why do people drive on parkways and park on driveways?
Cuz they feel like it
why is stuff in a truck called a shipment, and why is stuff on a ship called cargo?
To answer this question you would need to find the gravitational pull of Saturn from a distance of 12 feet with 13 mph solar winds.
7-11 has locks in case of a robbery too. I thought that was fairly obvious.
navid
07-03-2005, 06:38 PM
i think one that haunts us on this forum has to be...
why are people so stupid?
Does the universe ever actually end? And if it does, how? Is there just a big wall somewhere in space? And what's on the other side of it?
If God created man and earth and everything else....who created God? And who created God's creator?
twiztid one
07-04-2005, 04:22 AM
this one isnt ment to be funny its just tru...why is where you drive your car called a parkway and where u park your car called a driveway...was just thinking about that...
Roland
07-04-2005, 04:25 AM
this one always gets my friends
if you are traveling in a car at the speed of light and you turn on the headlughts what would happen?
have fun :lol:
this one always gets my friends
if you are traveling in a car at the speed of light and you turn on the headlughts what would happen?
have fun :lol:
That's easy, the world would implode.
Henkie
07-05-2005, 05:51 AM
If you are exactly travelling at the speed of light, that'ld mean the lightparticles of your headlights would reach someones eyes at the same time as the car reaches the person, so you actually wouldn't see the car until it hits or passes you.
BIll21
07-05-2005, 08:08 AM
this one always gets my friends
if you are traveling in a car at the speed of light and you turn on the headlughts what would happen?
have fun :lol:
nothing, the lights turn on.
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