Church Mistakes

[RckWorld]

Real Church Bloopers...


· Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help.

· Thursday night-Potluck Supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

· Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

· For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

· Thursday at 5PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become Little Mothers, please see the minister in his private study.


· This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

· Next Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and get a piece of paper.

· A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

· At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.


· The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement Friday.

· Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

· The 1991 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11.

· Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.


· 8 new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

· The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

· Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan who are preparing for the girth of their first child.

and last but not least...

· Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

woah I haven't laughed that much since my brother rammed into my garage door

· This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

Hehehehehe

lol theyre good

[GhostDog]

Originally Posted by RckWorld

Thursday at 5PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become Little Mothers, please see the minister in his private study.

favorite part, good post.. how do you guys find these anyways?? did you just notice this from your church?

[RckWorld]

Searched on the net and some I have actually seen myself

[Stardust]

"The most powerfull position is on your knees."

"For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs."

What was this one supposed to say?

'it' was used reffering to the nursery, not the kids. bad grammar

i got one to add that my church had made for a prayer session
it goes..
-the best postion is on your knees

-edit my bad i didnt read the forum

Nice one, reps are in order

By teh way, my fave was the last one.

[Devastation]

Morning Sermon--Jesus Walks on Water.
Evening Sermon--Searching for Jesus.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

LOL!!!HAHAHAHAH


i also like the weightwatchers one and the last one about cripple children

[Devastation]

"Low Self-Esteem Meeting" Thursday. Use rear doors.