• You should all be ashamed to be here.

  • This is no safe-space, snowflake.
This is no safe-space, snowflake.
 #2720  by Tim_Kerr
 Sun Mar 19, 2017 7:52 pm
I used to ๐Ÿ’ฆmasturbate๐Ÿ’ฆ onto ๐Ÿฆbirds๐Ÿฆ at a local park๐ŸŒฒ๐ŸŒณ๐ŸŒธ. ๐ŸšซNot a thing that Iโ€™m particularly ๐Ÿ˜‡proud of๐Ÿšซ but I be๐Ÿ’ฆCAME๐Ÿ’ฆ quite โœ…โœ…good at it. I was taking zinc ๐Ÿ’Šsupplements๐Ÿ’Ž๐Ÿ’‰ so I was shooting ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆmassive loads๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ and it became something of a โšฝ๐ŸŽพโšพsportโ›ณ๐ŸŽณ to me. For anyone๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿ™ interested๐Ÿ˜Ž here is your bestโœ… strategyโŒโญ•.๓พ ฎfirst๓พ ฎ, you need to find an ๐ŸŒŽisolated spot๐ŸŒ so you donโ€™t become a ๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿ‘ถsex offender๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿผ๐Ÿผ. I found๐Ÿ‘€ a โฌ‡short kind of โ†•channel area๐Ÿ˜‹๐Ÿ˜‰ where I ๐Ÿ‘€saw the ๐Ÿฆ๐Ÿ“pigeons would ๐Ÿ‘ชcongregate. Next, you ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜ทarouse๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ ๐Ÿ™‹yourself. I was usually ๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ˜Šcontent with envisioning๐Ÿ‘ฝ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘€ the occasional ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿƒjogging ๐Ÿ‘ญlady ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆcoming๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ over and โœ…โœ…taking a shitโ„ข ๐Ÿ’ฉ๐Ÿ’ฉon my chest๐Ÿ™‹ and that was โœ…โœ”enough to ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฅ๐Ÿš—fuel the fire๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ but if youโ€™re ๐Ÿšซnot๐Ÿšซ as โ˜บ๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜œsexually ๐Ÿ’กcharged๐Ÿ†โšกโšก as ๐Ÿ™‹me๐Ÿ™‹ just take some ๐Ÿ˜ป๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜˜porn๐Ÿ˜œ on the ๐Ÿƒgoโžก. After youโ€™re โœ”goodโœ” an ๐Ÿ˜๐ŸŒตhorny๐Ÿ˜‰, you get some ๐Ÿžbread. My ๐Ÿฆpigeons๐Ÿ“ preferred ๐Ÿž๐Ÿžwhite bread but ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ชhealthier ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿคbirds๐Ÿฃ might have a ๐Ÿ‘…taste๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’ฆ for ๐Ÿผ๐Ÿญhoney wheat๐ŸŒฟ๐ŸŒพ or maybe even ๐Ÿ”ขmultigrain๐Ÿ”ข. โœŠFat, unhealthy๐Ÿ˜ท birds๐Ÿ“๐Ÿฆ are โŒslower and โœ…easier to ๐Ÿ’ฆhit๐Ÿ’ฆ so rememberโœ…โœ” that. Once you are ๐Ÿ‘seated๐Ÿ‘‡ on the ๐ŸŒณbench and โš readyโš  to ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‰do the deed๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜›, whip๐Ÿ‘Š your ๐Ÿ†roosevelt๐Ÿ† out and scatter ๐Ÿžbread๐Ÿž out within a few ๐Ÿ‘‡feet of you. use your ๐Ÿ˜•judgement basedโœŠ๐Ÿ‘Œ on how farโ†” you know you can ๐Ÿ’ฆcum๐Ÿ’ฆ. I was a lonely๐Ÿ˜ข๐Ÿ˜ฅ and depraved๐Ÿ˜ฒ๐Ÿ˜ต soul๐Ÿ’ซโœจ who could ๐Ÿ”’hit targets๐Ÿ’ฆ the size of a ๐Ÿ‘Œthimble at distances up to ๓พ ฑfeet. You wait for the ๐Ÿฆpigeons๐Ÿฅ to begin โœŠ๐Ÿ‘Œeating and to get โ˜บcomfortable with ๐Ÿ™‹your presence. At this pointโฌ, you want to ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜ฏcoo gently๐Ÿ‘… and talk ๐Ÿ‘„sensually๐Ÿ’‹ to them to ๐Ÿ”’gain their โœ…trust. Now youโ€™re finally ready to ๐Ÿ’ฆcum๐Ÿ’ฆ on your ๐Ÿฆbird. This is a ๐Ÿ’ชtough part because the ๐Ÿƒrapid motion๐Ÿ’จ of ๐Ÿ’ฆmasturbation๐Ÿ† is very frightening๐Ÿ˜ฒ๐Ÿ˜ฎ to the birds๐Ÿค๐Ÿฆ, so you have to be ๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿ™ˆsubtle. Once you ๐Ÿ‘ตmaster๐Ÿ’ฏ a ๐Ÿ†—technique, you simply wind๐Ÿ”ƒ it upโฌ† and let it โ™ปgo๐Ÿ”›, โŒaiming depending on your past ๐Ÿ’ฆcumming๐Ÿ’ฆ experiences๐Ÿ†. I always ๐Ÿ’ฆcame๐Ÿ’ฆ ๐Ÿhigh๐Ÿƒ so I would โ›ณaim for the ๐Ÿฃneck of the ๐Ÿฆ๐Ÿฅbird and catch it right in the ๐Ÿ˜ข๐Ÿ˜›face. Itโ€™s an โœ…extremely ๐Ÿ’ฏsatisfying and ๐Ÿ˜erotic feeling๐Ÿ˜œ, ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ’€seeing those ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿ”birds reel๐Ÿฌ aroundโ™ป covered in ๐Ÿ’ฆcum๐Ÿ’ฆ and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city๐Ÿ—ผ๐Ÿ—ฝ๐Ÿ—พ. โ†•Eitherโ†”way I havenโ€™t ๐ŸŒdone it๐Ÿ† in ๐Ÿ•—years๐Ÿ• but every ๐Ÿ†—โœ”now and then I โœŠโœŠcatch myself๐Ÿ™‹ gazing๐Ÿ‘€ wistfully๐Ÿ˜ป at a flock of ๐Ÿฆ๐Ÿคbirds, ๐Ÿ†๐ŸŒcock ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‹throbbingโœŠ๐Ÿ‘Œ and ๐Ÿ•‘waiting for them to ๐ŸŒŽ๐ŸŒ‹land close๐ŸŒ to me๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ˜.
Hakik liked this
 #2830  by Demeter
 Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:42 am
Concerno wrote: โ†‘
Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:35 am
Demeter wrote: โ†‘
Sun Mar 19, 2017 8:35 pm
Bread isn't good for birds.
Importing vegan shit from South-America nad Asia isn't good for animals either.
This is like a serial killing sociopath calling me out on forgetting to say thank you after the cashier gave me my change.

You're trying too hard.