• Verdict on Kumacho

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 #57949  by pirate
 Tue Jul 11, 2017 10:11 pm
The prosecution would like to bring forth evidence forward for the council to diliberate on.

After our presentation you will come to the decision that KUMACHO IS A GOD DAMN BITCH.

First and foremost he wrote a thread claiming to have "almost died" after taking an extra dose of a beta blocker. I told some people at work about this and they "almost died" from laughing at his sorry ass. They literally had tears rolling down their eyes and were saying things like "WHAT A GOD DAMNED PUSSY." And "OH MY FUCKING LORD JESUS CHRIST, HOW CAN ANY WOMAN MARRY SOMEONE LIKE THAT? CERTAINLY MUST BE AN ASIAN HE MET AT A GO GO CLUB." (Sucky sucky mesooooo horrnayyyyy)

I know that you guys aren't medically knowledgeable, but I must tell you that it is ridiculous.

After being caught on his exaggeration he doubled down by stating that he could not be a pussy because he served in the military. Now, as a veteran myself, I can tell you that this is not necessarily true. Yes, I am the best fighter of all time, but I have known people to have served and be anything less than the man I am. You don't have to be a veteran to know that there are some pussies in the military, and one piece of evidence is the fact that he said he almost died by taking one extra dose of beta blocker. Honestly, they should reverse his retirement for saying some shit like that. People died and got maimed on the battlefield and he complains of taking an extra beta blocker. OMFG...it's like shitting on the flag right there.

Furthermore, he said that he almost got kicked out of the military once when he went to the hospital after crying that his nose was hurting so bad that he needed saline spray. As per his own admission, the guy said "if you ask for nasal spray one more GOD DAMN TIME I'M GOING TO DISCHARGE YOU FROM THE MILITARY FOR BEING A GOD DAMN PUSSY BITCH!!!!" After this ordeal, miraculously, his nasal problems were not so acute that he required hospitalization. He says the threat, after this guy called him out for being a pussy, "made me suck it up, because sick bay commandos don't last in the military. I thought about how I almost got discharged for being a giant bleeding vagina and had to keep it above that bar if I was going to last 20 years. It was tough, but I kept my complaints about my nasal passages to myself."

He has also lost his temper over minor ribbing. I would like to assert, on a separate minor charge, that he has no social skills whatsoever.

I'm sorry, Kumacho. You brought it to my attention and I need to know if you're on estrogen, or whatever transgendered people take to switch over to be a female or whatever the fuck Caitlyn calls him/herself now.

In your response, please call me Spider or as Mr. Silva. Thanks.
joecaca liked this
 #57952  by almostapathetic
 Tue Jul 11, 2017 10:31 pm
Early in the morning I can't sleep
I can't work and I can't eat
I've been drunk all day, can't concentrate
Maybe I'm making a big mistake

Oh no not again
It hurts so good
I don't understand
Infatuation
Infatuation
Infatuation
Infatuation
 #57954  by almostapathetic
 Tue Jul 11, 2017 10:48 pm
More like:
pirate wrote:
Tue Jul 11, 2017 10:11 pm
I've been remembering my dreams a lot lately, so I'm going to write some from last night down.

I was surfing with my family (not actually my family) and the waves were huge. Suddenly they got even more huge, and turned into an epic tsunami. I had a dog with me and was just able to guard it with my body from the crash of the wave, and everyone was okay and cheered because the dog was still breathing when we all rose to the surface. We crashed directly smack into our house, and the inside was somehow still dry so we went inside. Everyone got to the farthest point of the house away from the waves crashing on top of it. I decided to get something out of the garage (where we had come in and where the waves were crashing), then BOOM, waves started hitting, and as I made my way to the door the roof started swelling up with water and began to burst. I got smacked with a load of fish and seaweed then ran through with my dog before the whole thing collapsed. And I think that was the end of that dream.

Then I dreamed that I was caring for some children - my niece and the children I used to care for, and there was a serial killer who targeted me for some reason. He followed us after I picked them up from school, and I hoped we'd be safe once we got home, but then I got a text that he may or may not have done something in the house that would kill us. We might be safe, we might not. It was a game for him. So I kept all the kids in one room that seemed safe while I went exploring the house looking for things that might kill us. When I finished I figured it was pretty safe and the serial killer was just trying to scare me. I called their parents to come pick them up and get them to safety. Then I started getting tired, and realized all the kids were falling asleep too. Then I got a text that he had filled the house with ammonia and it was coming through the vents. (IDK why it was ammonia - should have been carbon dioxide since I didn't smell it and it put everyone to sleep.) I started opening all the windows and carrying the kids to the backyard. Then I stepped out in the front of the house where the serial killer was parked and I got shot with something then stabbed in the heart with a big piece of glass. I started making plans for death, made a little Facebook post as quick as I could saying goodbye. Then my mom showed up and said she had a chore for me and I was like okay mom but I'm kind of dying right now just so you know. She ignored me then started having me clean stuff as I was dying. I started getting confused about how I wasn't dead yet and feeling pretty awkward that I was going to have to explain that Facebook post. Then my arm started going limp and my mom was like what the fuck is your problem why aren't you helping me. Then I told her I was stabbed and she was like, wow and you didn't even tell me? Then I was like well I did but anyway I should probably go to the hospital now. And I think that's around when I woke up.
 #57961  by SkeetDixon
 Wed Jul 12, 2017 12:07 am
Jesus. Kumacho's rod went soft because of the medications. It wasn't anything you did, Pirate. You can ride it again someday, godwilling.
 #57987  by Kumacho
 Wed Jul 12, 2017 8:21 am
Image

I love that I can have an effect on a youngster like "Spider". It's nice to have people thinking about you, all the fucking time!