Kumacho's dad is embarrassed as fuck. After 18 years of being humiliated that they're genetically related, his dad is like "enlist in the navy, you snivelly little bitch...maybe that will make you in to a man. Lord knows I tried everything. And quit crying, you god damn...FUCK, WE'RE IN PUBLIC, please stop. You're embarrassing me. What do you need for me to give you to stop right now..."
Anyways, it didn't help. Kumacho was almost kicked out of the service for complaining about having dry nasal passages. He literally went to the hospital and said that he wouldn't work unless they gave him saline spray for his nose.
Well, when his dad heard about this, he told Kumacho the most interesting thing. He said "Son, I don't know what I did to fail you. When you were young I prayed to the lord Jesus Christ that you wouldn't be a homosexual. I was sure that you were...but as you got older, you proved me wrong. You're even less of a son than a homosexual. Son, I wish you were a homosexual. I mean that. I don't know what you think you are. I dont know why God fucked me over so hard..."
Kumacho's commanding officer threatened to discharge him from the hospital, but that isn't what decreased the complaining. It was his father's straight talk that made him realize that he wouldn't last as a sick bay commando. The whining and bitching and god damned drama didn't stop, but he stopped going to the hospital for nasal spray, and that kept him in the military for 20 years so he could retire off the taxpayer's dime.
And, as we got closer to the present time, Kumacho wrote a post here about almost dying from taking an extra beta blocker. It's probably for the best that his dad is dead, because it would've killed him. I can't imagine that guy NOT having a stroke or heart attack after reading what his "son" wrote about "almost dying."
Kumacho is a good guy though. Real talk.